I've always been considered an emotional person. It doesn't take much of anything to get me to feel something whether it be anger, sadness, or happiness. While I'm definitely not emotional to the point of instability or craziness, I am definitely more the feeling type than the thinking type (though, over analysis is also one of my many talents.) Some people would call me passionate (which I suppose is a more positive way to say "moody" but...whatever). But lately, I dunno...it's been different.
Over the last couple of weeks I've felt like that thing inside of me that is in charge of feeling stuff has been broken. It's not that I feel nothing, it's just that I feel things to a much lesser degree than I'm accustomed to. I guess you could say that when it comes to anything in my life right now, honestly, I could care less. School, work, social life...it all kind of blurs together for me. In some ways I feel like I'm walking through some sort of haze. Everything is blurry, everything I feel is dulled.
This in itself may be a good thing. I mean, I'm 24, maybe it's time I calmed down. Maybe it's time I stopped caring about every little thing and every single person I come into contact with on a daily basis. Maybe.
I think I may just need a change of scenery. Thank God I'm flying to San Francisco in a few days. I need to get out of this city. I think I need to put my life on hold for a little while so I can come back to it and be excited about it again. Or if not excited, at least feel something more than "Huh, yeah, I don't really care."
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