People have to learn not to piss me off...

Dear 41 year-old asshole, (not his real name but that is what he shall be known at forever more)

Excuse me, I don't think I addressed that email to you. Are you so pathetic that you need to spend your time breaking into other people's inboxes? You want to see a loser? Look in the mirror jackass.

Now, I wasn't going to get in the middle of all this since it has nothing to do with me but since you so kindly addressed your lewd, immature, completely uncalled for email to me, I feel the need to respond. And unlike __________, I'm not above making below the belt remarks. Scratch that, I'm not above making below the belt remarks when I'm dealing with scum like you.

I like how you use the term "loser" so frequently in your email. Maybe you need to work on your vocabulary a bit. But you're right, between the two of us, I'm definitely the loser. I mean, I'm young, have my whole life ahead of me, and have many people in my life who care about me. You, all you have to look forward to is losing your hair and having your kids grow up hating you because of what you did to their Mom. Clearly, I am the loser.

Don't email me again. And do us all a favor and stay out of ___________ life. She deserves someone much classier than you.

Sincerely,
T

PS--I hear you have a small dick. Clearly I am the loser again.